The "Lost In Space" episode

Screech, remember that "Lost In Space" episode of Saved By The Bell? Remember when Mr. Belding signed you up for a "young astronauts" NASA summer camp? Remember when you ventured onto a space ship called the "Jupiter 2"? Remember when the ship took off into space? Remember when everyone else on board was from the 1960s TV show "Lost In Space"? Remember when Dr. Smith found you and asked who you were? Remember when you told him who you were? Remember when he said everyone was going to be upset if they found you? Remember when he told you to go hide in the galley with this robot:


Remember when you went down into the galley and saw "Robot," a huge 7-foot tall clunky robot with flailing red arms and claws? Remember when the robot said "Danger! Danger Will Robinson! Danger!" Remember when you told Robot that your name was "Screech,” begged Robot to be quiet, and touched the buttons on Robot's chest, trying to get shut off his voice circuits? Remember when Robot said "Robot likes!" Remember when Robot said "Kevin, let's get Screech!" Remember when you turned around and saw your robot "Kevin" roll out from a closet? Remember when Kevin called you a faggot and said that he followed you from home! Remember when Kevin said "Remember what I did to you in the park? --BZZT--- You're gonna get twice the pain this time!" Remember when Robot's arms started flailing and he smacked you in the head with his metal claws? Remember when you fell into Kevin who proceeded to cut off your zubaz with his sharp metal claws? Remember when huge metal rods slowly grew out of Robot's and Kevin's respective groins? Remember when Robot grabbed you by your greasy 'fro and stuck his metal penis in your mouth? Remember when Kevin stuck his metal rod in your bleeding rectum? Remember when Kevin and Robot spit roasted you for the next 10 minutes while you screamed in pain? Remember when you looked up and saw a live video feed from the Houston office of NASA on the galley screen? Remember when you saw a bunch of engineers laughing at you as you were getting spit-roasted? Remember when they all called you a "SHITHEAD FAGGOT?" Remember when Kevin and Robot simultaneously expelled their oily robotic loads into your orifices? Remember when they rolled away from you and dropped you on the floor? Remember when Mr. Robinson walked into the galley and started yelling at you and said "We don't have room for any more stowaways!" Remember when he picked you up and threw your lifeless body into a space pod? Remember when they ejected the space pod and you spent the next week in the space pod until the space pod finally floated through the earth's atmosphere and landed in the Pacific Ocean? Remember when a Navy ship came across the space pod and picked you up? Remember when NASA sent you a bill for $30,000,000 for the cost of the space pod? You sure got screwed over that time!!!

"Screech's Music Album" episode

Screech, remember the "Rocumentary" episode where you, Slater, Zack, Kelly, Lisa, and Jessie formed the group "Zack Attack" and became famous singers? Remember when the group broke up when Zack tried to become the headline star? Remember how depressed you were when Mr. Belding showed up at your door crying one day after school and told you that there would be no reunion? Remember when you got to thinking that you should form your own singing group so that you'd finally be able to impress Slater enough to get him to let you do him in his muscular butt? Remember when you asked Mr. Belding to help you record your album? Remember when Mr. Belding said he would help and that his brother Rod owned a recording studio? Remember when you showed up at Rod's house the next day and he and Mr. Belding suggested you wear your mother's dress while singing? Remember when you said you didn't want to do so? Remember when Rod said that he was only trying to help create an appropriate image for you and the segment of people who would likely purchase your album? Remember when you finally agreed to do so? Remember when Rod also suggest you use the stage name "Joyce" so that people would confuse you with your previous "Zack Attack" band? Remember when you put on the dress and then recorded several fruity love songs? Remember when the best songs recorded that day were "The Diarrhea Dance" and "Gimme Some HIV Juice"? Remember when you finished recorded the album and got up to leave? Remember when Rod said, "where do you think you're going? You haven't paid me for the use of this equipment?" Remember when you said you thought he was letting you use the equipment for free? Remember when he called you a "STUPID FAGGOT" and then slapped you in the face with a boom microphone? Remember when Mr. Belding shoved the boom microphone up your ass and then threw you down on the ground and teabagged you? Remember when Rod pulled out the boom microphone and then ravished you, completely against you will for the next 15 minutes with his disease-ridden member?

Remember when you showed up at Bayside the next day with a noticeable limp? Remember when everyone was holding a copy of your album shown below and calling you a faggot? You sure got screwed over that time!

The "Reunion" episode

Screech, remember that Saved By The Bell reunion special episode? Remember when you received the inviation in the mail but initially weren't interested in going because of all the crap you endured during your high school years at Bayside, including the daily rapes and beatings? Remember when your mom called you and convinced you to attend the reunion? Remember when you thought that nobody would pick on you because you were all grown up and no longer scrawny, but were instead chubby, married, and sported a little uneven goatee? Remember when when you showed up at the reunion and Belding immediately pounced on you, clotheslining you and dragging you into his office for some hot, sweaty, unprotected buttsex? Remember when he ravished you for 15 minutes until he pulled out and blew his AIDS-tainted semen into your mouth? Remember when Milo ran into Belding's office and smacking you in the face and nuts with his mop? Remember when Slater crawled into the office throught the window next to the dumpster outside? Remember when Slater carried your naked body into Mr. Tuttle's classroom? Remember when Zack was already in there with Moose spit-roasting your mom, Mrs. Powers? Remember how Mrs. Powers was screaming in pleasure as Zack anally penetrated her? Remember how you screamed in pain as Slater anally penetrated you completely against your will? That was the best sitcom high school reunion episode ever!

Belding's movie, "Going Down"

Screech, remember that episode from Saved By The Bell: The New Class where Mr. Belding told you he was going to be acting in a movie? Remember when he said the name of the movie was "Going Down," and he was playing the character "Uncle Frank"? Remember how excited you were for him? Remember when he asked if you wanted to be "rape victim #1"?? Remember how good that made you feel because you thought he was asking you if you wanted a role in the movie? Remember when you eagerly accepted? Remember when you thought you were going to become a big-time movie star and finally earn respect from your peers? Remember when you quickly discovered that you would not earn and respect when you showed up at Belding's the next day and told him you were ready for the acting role? Remember when he said "there's no acting for you Screech, I'M REALLY GONNA RAPE YOU, FAGGOT!!!!" Remember when he subsequently had unprotected buttsex with you and shot his HIV+ sperm in your butt? You really got screwed over that time!