Wednesday, March 28, 2007

"The Sprang" Episode Recap

28th March 2007 - 12:15:42 AM
79871 : Ox

Screech, remember that episode where you were Lisa Turtle’s dance partner in the dance contest at the Max? Remember when you danced “the sprang” with Lisa and beat out Zack and Slater in the contest and Kasey Kasim crowned you and Lisa as the winners? Remember how Slater, Zack, and Mr. Belding were initially happy for you and Lisa because they felt sorry for Lisa who had sprained her ankle before the contest? Remember how you kept talking shit to Zack and Slater then next day at school telling them they totally sucked and you were the greatest dancer in the world, a modern day jewish MC Hammer on the dance floor? Remember when Slater and Zack asked you to show them some of your dance moves after school in your homeroom? Remember when you showed up at 3:15 after the final bell and Zack and Slater showed up a couple minutes later? Remember when they brought Mr. Belding with them? Remember when Slater asked you to show him some of your dance moves? Remember when you hopped around in a circle on one foot like a total retard and said, “watch me cut a rug, guys!!!” Remember when Slater said, “I’ll show you some moves” and then yanked off his pants, revealing black tights beneath? Remember when Slater popped a tape of Mexican restaurant music in boom box and hit the play button? Remember when Slater farted and it smelled like Doritos and you got turned on? Remember when Slater grabbed out and danced the lambada dirty dancing move with you? Remember when Slater kept rubbing his lumpy crotch against your scrawny body and you got really turned on? Remember when Belding said “my turn!” and then changed the tape to Sir Mix-a-lot’s “Baby Got Back” and said he was going to show you how to grind? Remember how you got excited and had a huge stupid grin on your face because you figured the Bayside gang had finally accepted you? Remember how less excited you were when you turned with your back to Belding and he punched you in the back and threw you down into a row of classroom seats? Remember when Belding then dropped his pants, grabbed you by the jewfro, and rubbed his huge middle-aged schlong against your lips and face? Remember when he said “how do you like my grind move, BITCH!!?” Remember when he shot his mammoth load down your throat and then threw you to the floor? Remember when Zack said “Screech, here’s the ‘running man’” and then did the running man dance right on your tiny nutsack, causing extreme discomfort? Remember when Zack said “Screech, lets do the limbo! Can you go under the limbo stick?” Remember when Zack pulled out a limbo stick and poked you in the nuts with it and then smacked you in your gonzo nose? Remember when Slater yanked off your Zubaz pants and Zack sodomized you with the limbo stick? Remember when you were in intense pain and then suddenly noticed a creaking sound coming from the ceiling tiles in the classroom? Remember when you thought that maybe an earthquake was occurring and that was the source of the creaking? Remember when all of a sudden Mr. Tuttle fell 12 feet from the ceiling tiles and landed on the floor? Remember r how his pants were off and his was rapidly masturbating to your cries of pain? Remember how Tuttle hit his head on a desk on the way down and was bleeding all over the place? Remember when the sight of Tuttle masturbating while laying in a puddle of his own blood turned on Slater? Remember when Slater then viciously raped you for the next 10 minutes until he pulled out and shot his spicy load in your jewfro? Remember when he finished and then hi-fived Belding and Zack and got up to leave you and your bloody and torn asshole to fend for yourself? Remember when Tuttle managed to get to a phone and called the police? Remember how relieved you were because you thought that Tuttle was going to tell the truth and end your daily suffering? Remember when Tuttle instead said that you hit him, causing his would, and then tried to rape him? Remember when you received two months of detection? The Bayside gang really got you good that time!

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

The "Jawbreakers" Episode recap

12th March 2007 - 09:23:02 PM
79790 : Ox

Screech, remember that episode from Saved By The Bell: The New Class where Mr. Belding took you to a drive-in movie for your birthday? Remember how he took you to see “The Birdcage”? Remember how much you enjoyed the movie because you are queer and you enjoyed the gay theme of the movie? Remember when Mr. Belding got out of his rusty station wagon and walked to the concession stand to get some candy? Remember when he got three huge boxes of Sno-Caps and a package of Jawbreakers candy? Remember when he ripped open the boxes of Sno-Caps and gobbled down about three pounds of Sno-Caps in about 15 seconds? Remember when he ripped open the package of Jawbreakers and started munching on them? Remember when you asked for a Jawbreaker? Remember when Mr. Belding said he ate the last one but that he had a “Ball Breaker” for you if you were interested? Remember how you had never heard of Ball Breakers, but you just assumed it must be some other kind of candy? Remember when you asked for a Ball Breaker and Mr. Belding told you to close your eyes and stick out your tongue? Remember when Mr. Belding reached over to the passenger’s side seat and punched you in the junk? Remember when you screamed out in pain? Remember when Mr. Belding smacked you in the groin with a tire jack that had been sitting under your seat? Remember when Mr. Tuttle peaked his head out from the back seat and you realized that he had been in the car the whole time waiting for this moment? Remember how vigorously he was masturbating to the sounds of your screams? Remember when Mr. Belding whipped out his massive schlong and shoved it into your mouth? Remember when Mr. Belding and Tuttle both blew their loads at the same time into your jew-fro? Remember when they kicked you out of the car and left you for dead? Mr. Belding really got you good that time!!!!!!